Just A Day: Chapter 1

"Roxas!  Roxas!  Come on!  Come on, I want an ice cream!" Sora pulled on his twin brother's arm, pointing at the air conditioned shop.  The brunette boy jumped up and down, yelling and pointing, pointing and yelling.  Roxas, the older twin of the two, smiled and held out his hand.

"Alright, Sora, alright.  Calm down.  We're almost there, ok?  We're gonna have ice cream soon." Roxas calmly stepped forward as Sora took his hand.  When the two boys reached the street Sora pulled on Roxas' hand, keeping him from crossing.  "Sora!" Roxas winced, trying to loosen Sora's grip on his hand.

"No, Roxas!  My teacher said to always look both ways before crossing any street.  You didn't look!" Sora pleaded with his brother, pulling his hand back.  Roxas pulled his hand forward.

"Alright!  Let's look then." Roxas turned his head left, right, then left again.  After making sure the coast was clear, Roxas took Sora across the street and into the parlor.  "Now, when we get to the parlor you can only get one ice cream," Roxas said, using a gentle but firm tone.

"But...!  I want two ice creams!  Roxaaaaaaaaaaas!" Sora whined and Roxas shook his head.

"No, Sora.  We only have enough money for one for you and one for me," Roxas replied, using the same tone.  Sora cried out in frustration, his voice cracking as he did.  Many of the patrons at the ice cream parlor looked at the two.  Roxas winced and turned to his brother.  "Sora!  Sora!  You can have two!  I don't even want an ice cream, ok?"

"Yay!  Thank you, Roxas!" Sora's bright blue eyes lit up and he let go of his brother's hand, rushing into the cool building.  Roxas watched his brother and sighed, a nervous feeling etching its way into his stomach.  He walked in and stood next to his brother, who was as giddy as a child.  "Ice cream, Roxas!  Ice cream!"  Roxas smiled at his brother weakly, nodding his head.  Sora looked away and began bouncing on the balls of his feet.  "We're next, we're next!"

When the two got home, Sora carrying to chocolate fudge bars in his hands, while also wearing them on his face a shirt, Roxas departed to his bedroom.  Their mother was waiting for them, a wash cloth already in her hand.  Roxas could hear Sora's laughter as he walked down the hall.  The blonde boy's face drooped as he closed his door.  He covered his eyes with one hand and threaded the fingers of his other hand in his hair.  After standing for a moment, Roxas moved to his desk.  He pulled out his notebook, full of entries of his life, and a pencil.  He opened to the next clean page and began writing.

It's getting harder and harder to feel happy around here.  Sure everything is cheerful, and we don't really fight, but I can't shred this feeling of guilt and nausea.  I feel so nervous all the time.  I don't know who's around and I don't know how they will react to Sora.  Sora doesn't even seem to notice the looks people give him.  He's so oblivious.  Sometimes, I wish I was as oblivious as he is.  I want to be as happy as he is.  But, these feelings just keep me weighted down.  I'm 19 now.  Sora is 19.  We're moving on in our lives and I go to college next fall.  Sora won't be with me.  I don't want him to have to stay here.  But there is no way....  No school accepted him.  He has to stay here.  It's not like we were expecting a school to accept Sora, not with his disability, but I think I had hope somewhere in my heart.
I don't know whether or not I will be able to visit often.  This is what scares me the most.  I won't be able to be around him, even every other weekend.  I'm going half way across the nation.  How will he be able to be ok without knowing how I am?  When I went to overnight things as a kid, he would freak out.  How will he be ok?  How will I be ok?

Roxas closed his journal and sighed.  Instead of writing more, like he usually did, he closed his notebook and lay down on his bed, napping until he was called for dinner.  Sora was setting the table when Roxas came out, making sure to put down the utensils fork, knife, then spoon, saying each utensils name aloud as he set them down.  Roxas watched before leaning into the kitchen.

"Mom, do we really need spoons tonight?" Roxas asked.  Sora looked up at him a moment, smiling while sucking on his lower lip.  Roxas smiled back.

"I don't think so honey, but let your brother set the table how he wants," she replied.  Roxas nodded and sat at the table, frowning a little at the thought of having to wash any extra dishes, but dealing with it to please his brother.  Their mother brought out some food just as their front door opened.  Roxas went into the kitchen to get some drinks as his father came in, sighing heavily.

It was the same every night.  When their father came home, he would sigh and set down his things before sitting at the head of the table.  Dinner didn't include much talk.  However, that night communication rose to an all new level.

"Mommy, can you pass me the peas and carrots?" Sora asked, his napkin tucked into his shirt like a bib.

"Of course, honey," she replied.  She lifted the bowl and passed it to the brunette.  He took the dish and lifted it over the table corner.  Suddenly, his fingers lost grip of the bowl and, as if in slow motion, the glass dinnerware fell from his grasp, onto the corner of the table, tipping off the edge and falling to the floor with a loud, deafening crash.  For a few seconds, all was quiet through the house.

"Sora!  What is wrong with you?  How many times have we told you to not lift the dishes over the floor?" Lexeaus, their father, stood up angrily and looked down at Sora.  Sora, nervously wrung his hands and shook his head.

"I-I'm sorry, Daddy...." Sora's eyes were downcast and distraught as he fought to keep his eyes clear.

"Honey, don't overreact.  It's just bowl," their mother, Naminé, said gently.

"But now the vegetables are ruined.  We can't eat them, they're covered in glass!" Lexeaus tossed his hands in the air angrily, raising his voice.  Sora began to blubber, tears spilling down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry, Daddy!  Daddy, I'm sorry!" He began to cry harder, blubbering and sobbing.  Roxas looked to his father.

"Dad, calm down.  You're scaring him," Roxas said nervously.  The large man looked down at him, his eyes piercing through Roxas.

"Take your brother to his room.  Bring some dinner with you."  The man's voice was low and dangerous; it made Roxas' stomach churn.  The blonde twin grabbed the two plates of food and cooed to his brother.

"Come on, let's go." Sora followed his brother, sniffling and stammering.

"Does he know I'm sorry, Roxas?  Do you forgive me, Roxas?  I'm sorry...." Sora's voice was cracking and pitiful.  Roxas opened the door to his brother's room and set down the food before taking his brother into his arms.

"He knows, Sora.  And I forgive you.  We all forgive you.  Shhh, shhh." Roxas hugged Sora, stroking his brother's hair gently as the brunette cried into his shirt.  Roxas rocked them back and forth, back and forth, hoping the gentle rocking motion would sooth his frightened, upset brother.

The next day, the two brothers went to the mall.  Roxas needed to get some clothes for his new year of school, even though it was 2 months or so away, and Naminé was out, so Sora had to come with.  Roxas didn't mind, but he knew that if Sora got lost, or if he wanted something, trouble would ensue.  Roxas held his brother's hand as the maneuvered their way through the large shopping center.  Sora looked around, laughing and poking at the fake plants.  Roxas smiled a little and pulled Sora up to one of the food areas.  Behind the counter was a tall, thin redhead.  He smiled at the two.

"Hello and welcome to Fat Fries, home of the the greasiest crap ever," the redhead, who's name tag read 'Axel', greeted.  Roxas snorted and Sora laughed loudly.  The redhead seemed amused that his joke went over well, then he leaned forward a bit.  "Oh hey, you're Roxas Wilman, right?" Roxas cringed, but nodded.  He couldn't count how often people would ask that, following with, "You're brother's retarded, right?" Or, "Are you as fucked up as...you know?"  Roxas hoped that the redhead wouldn't say anything like that in front of Sora.  None of the others had said it in front of his brother, but the redhead didn't look like someone who would stay within boundaries.  "Cool.  I think it's awesome how you care for your brother, even with his mental disability."  Axel smiled at Roxas, who looked at him in disbelief.  Sora just smiled and slammed his hands on the counter, leaning forward.

"Roxas is the best-est-est brother in the whole wide-est-est world!" Sora's grin widened when Axel chuckled in agreement.  Axel took their order and when Sora ran to the other end of the counter to wait for the food, Roxas turned to Axel.

"Thank you," he said, quietly.  Axel tilted his head in confusion.

"For what?" Axel was puzzled.

"For not calling him retarded.  Or calling me a freak," the blonde replied smoothly.  Axel's eyes widened, then narrowed.

"People actually say that to you?" He inquired.

"Yeah.  It's kind of rough." Roxas scratched his arm awkwardly.  "Fortunately, no one has said that around Sora.  He'd freak out if anyone said anything that could have insulted me.  He wouldn't even notice if they made a jab at him." Roxas looked up at Axel, who seemed to have lost his cheery mood.

"I'm sorry people are such ass holes," Axel grumbled.

"It happens," Roxas replied.

"Hey, maybe since there are so many asses, you wouldn't mind hanging out with someone who's not one."  Roxas looked confused by Axel's words, so the redhead grabbed a pen and wrote down a number on the back of Roxas' receipt.  "Call me anytime if you wanna hang, kay?" Axel smiled in a friendly manner.  Roxas smiled and took the number, happiness and gratefulness showing in his eyes.

"Yeah, I will."